My first Mother's Day
Allyson and Aaron were more excited than I was, I think. I have been overwhelmed. Our family is in such a season of transition. Mommy has been under a lot of stress as the school year wraps up and we transition to summer schedules and things get busy with baseball season and I transition to a new job. But I am always joyful and thankful for the gift God has given me in Allyson and Aaron. Today spontaneously, they would both shout out "Happy Mother's Day!" I just sense that they knew the significance of today as I did. For our family, it was not just another holiday created by Hallmark. (I love giving and getting those greeting cards, trust me!) But, today was a huge mile marker in our life together as a forever family that NO earthly principality can ever take us apart. We are a family now, not only in God's eyes, but in the court's eyes. And today was another day in the first official year for us to celebrate. Writing this helps me to understand why I have been so emotional this week and attached to this seemingly commercialized holiday.
When I think back to how it all started, I feel like I should paint you the picture of the day in December when we went to the midtown Children's Division office. The beating in my heart could have been heard by everyone in the car if their had been anyone else besides myself and my husband. Had we made the right choice? I know I hadn't asked all the questions. It was a few days after Christmas. They need a home. What were we getting into? Two children? We had planned on only taking one for our first placement. There they were--standing right inside the doors of the children's division doors. My husband and I had been getting haircuts. We had been later than we had thought. The boy was 14 months. She was 2. Although they had been with a relative for a weekend, they still looked haggard. While we had prepared to take a placement, we still needed other thing specific to these two children. The anxiety was so great in Allyson, that I couldn't take my hands off the cart at the store without her screaming and huge tears streaming down her sunken face. What had these kids been through? Would they be able to trust us or anyone? I didn't know if we had what it would take to help them. When Bubby would look at me today, smile, his big blue eyes shining and say, "Happy Mother's Day!", and at bedtime, when Sissy snuggled up on my lap and just lay there with me--something she never does, I received the best Mother's Day gifts I could have been given. Today I could offically claim them as my Mother's Day gifts.When I think about how much I love my kids, my eyes tear up. Ally is not that same child in the shopping cart. She is reading and sounding out words at 4 years old. She can count, she has bonded with me and my husband. Aaron knows his sounds of his letters, recognizes them. He wasn't crawling, sitting up, talking when we met him. Lord, your love has washed over a multitude of things and made them new.
And I never would have been able to do the things I have done for these children had it not been for the role model in my life growing up. My mother. Who has shown me unconditional love. Right from wrong. That you do unto others as you would want to be treated. That is the heart of compassion and love.
